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Sunday Night Letter Reboot! Slowing Down to Feel Better at Work


Start with Small Career Counselling + Coaching offers one-on-one, private and confidential career coaching to women in their forties and fifties across Canada who are ready for their next chapter. Located in the Golden Horseshoe but with services offered virtually it's a convenient way to get on track with career goals + dreams.

On Sunday evenings I send out this letter inspired early on by my own "Sunday Night Blues". If you'd like to start receiving it, send an email to startingwithsmall@gmail.com and I'll put you on the list to get it, or if you'd prefer to keep your email to yourself, just visit my website each Wednesday where I'll post the letter from the Sunday before. I started my private practice because I believed much was missing in the way career services were being provided. I also believed (still do) that the hiring processes and best practices followed by many companies are flawed, if not broken. I spent from 2001 to 2011 watching how things were being done as an insider and came to realize I wanted to offer something different. I didn't go into private practice as a way to get rich, work less, or "set my soul free". I did it because I could not NOT do it. I didn't give up my day job (including great benefits, pension etc.) on a whim so I could have some sort of a "laptop" lifestyle. Nope. I'm a formally trained career counsellor and coach with almost 2 decades of experience. I got tired of watching good people try to do good things for good people within systems that were broken. That's the easiest way I can say it. I've been helping people get what I believe are better results, on my own terms for just shy of 10 years now. I don't offer any advice that I haven't seen work or that isn't rooted in science. So, if this sounds good to you, let's get into it. In the world of personal + career development, we talk a lot about goals. As a self-employed person, I do set goals and targets for my business as a way to measure how things are going and to continue to grow and improve. The way I approach my goals; however, is taking into consideration not only my “end goals”, but my daily processes and my performance. As the name of my practice suggests, I value small consistent gains over time. It's really important to me that I act out of integrity, first and foremost with the best interest of the people I serve front and centre. I don't "hustle", I don't "grind it out", and I don't chase clients or vanity metrics (things like "likes" or "followers"). I work on remaining clear about what's important to me, what I believe in and then I act from there. I try not to rush through things just to get them done. I've been there and done that and had the burn out to show for it afterwards. Have you ever experienced that feeling of hurrying up with things to just get them over with so you can finally rest, relax or take a breather? I remember noticing my tendency to “rush” when there was really no need to. I had this false sense of urgency in things. I rushed the kids out the door, I rushed through grocery shopping, I rushed my visits with my sister, I rushed through gardening, I rushed through work meetings. I found I was rushing through my whole life. One day I thought “why”? I was trying to hit a bunch of made up “goals” and timelines that didn’t really mean much. Rushing to get to places either literally or figuratively sucked the pleasure out of everything. Rather than just take my time and enjoy what I could (or at least be present for it), I hurried in a blaze of anxiety and stress. It was like trying to chase a state of bliss that never actually ever materialized because once I was “there”, another demand or goal would take over. Often my clients tell me they can relate to this. So, we work on slowing things down. It can feel hard to do. I have to remind myself pretty often that there's no rush--that as long as I’m breathing, there will be things to do. I might as well try to take life in along the way. Chill out and breathe while I complete the task. I have to remind myself to TRULY care about things. I have to remind myself of what matters. So, rather than just deciding what I need to accomplish for the day, I try to remember how I want to feel, how I want to show up, how I want to be. I try to focus on the process and not just the result. I take notice of my performance, not just the goal. Am I being short with my loved ones? Am I truly listening to my colleagues? Do I see my neighbours, and the beauty of the sky? Do I saver my coffee noticing it’s slow drip from the maker or do I gulp it down in an effort to come alive? So, I work on noticing. This is where I start with people. Life isn't a race. If it was, what would be your finish line? Think about that for a minute. Looking through a lens of compassionate curiosity ask yourself: Am I racing through the day? Am I listening to myself? Am I scheduling things thoughtfully? There’s time for it all. There’s time for everything. The trick isn’t to rush, the trick is to slow down. This week remind yourself that you have time. Have a wonderful week.


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