Start with Small Career Counselling + Coaching offers one-on-one, private and confidential career coaching to professionals across Canada who feel stuck in career and in life. Christine specializes in guiding Leaders, Creatives, and Entrepreneurs who wish to find their anything but ordinary career + life. Located in the Golden Horseshoe but with services offered virtually it's a convenient way to get on track with career goals + dreams.
People often tell me they wish they had more confidence. They'll say it the same way they might say "I wish I was taller".
Confidence doesn't come standard with every brain. On the contrary, our brains come with fear, worry, and doubt.
Of course we can't make ourselves grow taller, but luckily we can increase our confidence. Not surprisingly, of course we do this by changing the thoughts we have about our self. By changing our identity.
To change our identity and change our thoughts, we have to practice doing things a little differently. In my work with clients I always start with feelings. Our confidence increases in our self when we can develop a belief that we have our own back. One way to do this is to learn how to stop resisting our feelings. When we allow ourselves to feel all of our emotions--even those awful ones like humiliation, rejection, embarrassment, and isolation, we start giving our brain proof that we can indeed do this and not die. The next time we're tempted to avoid something because we're scared of how it might make us feel, we remember that even if we fail and feel embarrassed, we can survive. If we can do this, we can begin to change our identity. After all, the reason we avoid doing certain things is because we don't like how we'll feel if something goes wrong. We don't like what we'll make something going wrong mean about our self.
Fear doesn’t prevent self-confidence—the unwillingness to feel fear does. We have to be willing to experience discomfort consistently in order to be self-confident. Is it any wonder this can be a tricky thing to do?
It's not easy but it's worth it. Simply put, self-confidence is practiced self-belief. You have to be certain about yourself, certain that you can feel anything and be okay. You can learn how. You don't even have to rely on your ability—rely on your belief that you can handle anything because it all boils down to feelings. You can feel anything and survive. Right?
This is something I teach and coach on. Head on over here to schedule a chat to learn more.